There's one thing in this world that I can always trust -- my gut. It will feel hollow and empty when I'm around a person who is bad for me. It will burn with fire when I'm challenging myself to do something great. It will squeeze and pinch when I'm doing something that violates one of my core values. It will feel warm and peaceful when in the presence of a beautiful women I share a connection with. My body will always tell me the direction I need to head in.
Lance Mason says that there are two kinds of discomfort our bodies will feel when we're becoming the cool, confident and charismatic man that we always wanted to be. The way I've come to learn it, one feeling is a general sense of stepping out of your comfort zone. You feel uncomfortable, but in a way that is a sign of growth. The second feeling is when you're doing something that is just not you. You feel uncomfortable, but it is coupled with feelings of regret, sorrow, or guilt. It is discomfort combined with other negative emotions, which is your body's way of telling you to knock it the fuck off.
At first, it's tough to distinguish between these two feelings. I've spent a lot of time really paying attention to my body and I've become pretty good at discerning what message my body is trying to tell me.
The good kind of discomfort sends me a message kind of like this: "God dammit Joey! You want to do what? We haven't done this before. Are you sure your ready for this? This is a little weird. Fuck it. This is what you want to do. The best version of yourself does this shit. Now stop being a little pussy and do it."
This is the feeling I get when I approach a cute girl on a crowded subway and I have an entire audience watching me. It's the feeling I got when I first tried an edgy banter line. It's the feeling I got the first time I sincerely told a girl she was cute. It's the feeling I get when I'm pushing myself in a positive direction.
The second feeling is a bad discomfort that starts in my stomach, travels up my chest and clenches my throat. To put the feeling into words, it's says something like this: "Woah. This is weird. Like really weird. When the hell did I start doing this? I don't think I should be doing this. I don't want to do this. Why the hell am I doing this? Oh yeah, because somebody else said to do it. This isn't me. I feel like a douche bag."
This is the feeling I got whenever I tried to demonstrate higher value over people. This is the feeling I got when I would tell other people's stories that I read on the internet. This is the feeling I got whenever I was trying to manipulate someone.
Our bodies know when we are doing something that is totally out of wack with who we are, and when we are pushing to become more of ourselves. This is not, however, the voice going on inside of our heads. Your brain is a super computer that very quickly processes data from your past experiences and tries to protect you at all costs. Your body is reliable, your brain is not. Sure, if your brain tells you "Bus!!! Move!!!," you want to listen to it. But in most cases, especially when approaching women, your brain is completely full of shit. Treat it like your Uncle who drinks too much wine at dinner and then starts talking out of his ass about how much tail he used to get when he was younger. You acknowledge it, but don't really take it seriously :)
Trust your gut, it'll never lead you astray.
